Let us appreciate the awesomeness of Norman Sanders:

The difference between ugly and cute is really only a matter of eye size, I think. Or maybe it’s the amount of eyes. I’m still trying to figure that out for myself.

Today I’ve been drooling over the work Norman Sanders did for Topps back in the day: Ugly Stickers, Frankenstein Valentines, Wacky Packs…its great stuff! It really brings me back to a childhood I never lived, which, I imagine, was full of go-carts and RALEIGH CHOPPERS. By the time I came around, we had our version of these cards -- Garbage Pail Kids, which I collected compulsively. (Yes, I still have them. And no mom, you can’t sell them.)But Norman Saunder's stuff just had a ton of low-brow klass!


What do The Flakes and The Lovemakers have in common? Absolutely nothing, but they both opened for The Kaiser Chiefs at Slims on Tuesday. I hadn’t heard of the Kaiser Chiefs (I’m sooo out of it, right? I haven’t seen MTV in approximately five years…and it was EuroMTV that I saw last, interrupted by Hungarian commercials!), but Desmond informed me they were hot stuff…sensitive scarf boys and all. So I got to hang around back stage, drinking free beer and eating free Cheese Nips with The Flakes, periodically mingling with the other bands, which were all kept in separate rooms. Proctor was brave enough to actually enter the Flakes’ room and discuss vintage suits with Brett. After several free beers, Peepin’ John and I thought it would be really funny to erase strategic letters from the bands’ names, which were written in chalk on each dressing room door. Unfortunately, we didn’t have much to work with (letter-wise and brain-wise): The Flakes became He Fake, The Lovemakers became The Makers (remember them?), and The Kaiser Chiefs…well, due to the chalk penmanship, we were able to get it to look like The Ass Chefs. Sorry Ass Chefs.


Friday night we saw everyone's favorite jugless jug-time band The Poontang Wranglers put on a great show at the Argus. The Commadore was really in his prime, but as this film clip shows, you really don't want to be there when the laughter stops. Bacon.

If you feel like watching more film clips (without bacon)...
Here are some highlights from Jim's Birthday Show courtesy of InterNebbish:

The Sort Outs and Prince Kong (Brett) go ape shit.

Odessa Lil doing the MC thing!

Cigarette and Co.

Chicken Strips.

The go-going Catyana!

Chris Cobb at Hunter S!


If you think you were at Jim's birthday party, you may want to take this quiz to make sure! Sailor Billy, this is awesome!

You scored 85 Memory and 31 Drunkedness!

You obviously made the mistake of coming for the show because you didn't have nearly enough to drink. After seeing the show though, I'm sure that mistake won't happen twice.

The Do you remember Jim's birthday Test written by pepperbear on Ok Cupid

Other aftermath:
"roving bands of vigilante can-can girls..."
The DNA Lounge blog.
DNA pictures!


People are just beginning to emerge from the massively entertaining hangover known as JIM's BIRTHDAY SHOW at the DNA Lounge Sunday night. InterNebbish has posted some snappy photos here .
It looks like he left before we blew up the DNA, though. Rose Pistola got hold of several thousands of ping pong balls so we could shower the DNA at the end of our performance of Strasnic! Strasnic! It looked like snow.

Here are some of Pat McCarthy's photos!
link: http://www.worldcrimeleague.net/2005-03-13%20Jim's%2040th%20Birthday%20-%20DNA%20Lounge/index.htm

The countdown to ping pong hell...

Rose distributes the ping pong balls...

Death to hecklers...

Eddie Dane and everyone's favorite gorilla, Gorilla X.

Today's Elephant Link:
This is the sort of thing that will play on ENDLESS loop in my brain! Thanks a lot, Ralph! I want an Elephant.


Hey! Look! It's Tom Servo!

And here's Brett being taken back to the mothership!

And later that day...

The next weekend I was sick, but Peachy J. Monkey made it to Jeff and Monique's Doomsday Ball. I hope he didn't do anything to embarrass me...

Free show Sunday Night!


The Chronicle gets nostalgic for the Mile High Club...me too.
Lisa...you did good.

"...Another told McDonald how he stood next to James Brown in Eli's bathroom."
I think James Brown is still in that bathroom...

"Tuesday nights were reserved for SpeakEasily, a burlesque show that became one of the club's most popular attractions."
Oakland was good to us! Long live Oakland!


From your blog to mine:
Internebbish and Roky caught on film at SpeakEasily. Make sure you mouse over the g-string.


Saturday’s Bawdy Island Hullabaloo show at Thee Parkside was epic…does anyone have any photos from Saturday??? We’re all bruised up from trying to keep up with our own shtick that night, but what a great crowd. You know you’re at a good show when the audience starts taking their clothes off.
A big sloppy SpeakEasily thanks to everyone who came out to the Madrone Lounge Sunday. DJ Kurt Vile was the tops! Roky and Cherry danced on the bar! Eerie won a burlap bag! I do feel bad for those who were in the back and couldn’t see…but a home with a stage is in our future, I’m sure.
My friend Ralph asked if I felt the day-after-the-show let down on Monday, but really I was too wrung out to notice. Later that day Brett and I partook in some preventative depression therapy…shopping. Brett’s really good at shopping…a lot better than I am. I’m the husband holding the purse in the mall.

For Sailor Billy Fans:
Are you as up on Sailor Billy as you should be? Sailor Billy has authored a quiz on himself…good luck!

AND…just when you thought you were safe from SpeakEasily…
SpeakEasily Joins San Francisco’s Burlesque Stars to say… “Happy Birthday Old Man” this Sunday @ DNA…FREE!

Free is a very good price indeed!

SUNDAY, MARCH 13TH, at the DNA! ***FREE!***

DNA Lounge
375 Eleventh Street at Harrison, SF
9PM (truly!) - 'til it's Over
*21+Up w/I.D.*

A Burlesque Birthday Blow-Out! SPECTACULAR! SPECTACULAR!'s MC, KINGFISH (a.k.a. "Jim") TURNS 40! Come on down and join the fun as a Cavalcade of Comedy Stars, and a Bevy of Burlesque Beauties, roast him, toast him and celebrate this highly unexpected achievement!

Featuring, Live On-Stage!

Rock & Roll by THE SORT-OUTS!
Plus Many, Many More!---------

And Fresh from the Ukraine, Eastern Europe's Greatest Traveling Cabaret Revue!
--featuring Sailor Fyodor! Rose Escopeta! JESUS! And The World's Hairiest Bald Man, Josef & His Technicolor Hirsute!


And don't miss the Wanton Bloodbath that will be... THE 1ST INTERNATIONAL M.C. CHALLENGE!

WEAR A FEZ IF YOU HAVE ONE! (or can grab one during a parade... )


SpeakEasily in The SF WEEKLY!
Who knew! I guess we are pretty kitsch...

Oh, You Kid
Vintage kitsch onstage
SUN 3/6
You just gotta love a revue that claims to offer "Weimar perversions at rock-bottom Oakland prices," particularly when it pays a visit to your neck of the woods. The sad demise of the East Bay venue the Mile High Club has left "SpeakEasily" without a regular home for its slate of performances that pay tribute to the Jazz Age: guys strumming ukuleles, burlesque girls in rolled stockings, that sort of thing. But Oakland's loss is S.F.'s gain. Tonight "SpeakEasily" invades the Madrone Lounge with a neat lineup of gimcracks: dancing, prancing rent-boy Roky Roulette; the Indra's retro-Hollywood striptease and song (she does a great Dietrich); and the rentable attentions of the Meter Dancers, who'll spin you around the dance floor for a couple of bucks. Whoop it up at 9 p.m. at the Madrone, 500 Divisadero (at Fell), S.F. Admission is $4-6; call 241-0202 or visit www.audrawolfmann.net. -- Joyce Slaton
Read it!